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Koopa, You A Chicken!

Before VH1's stellar pop culture retrospectives like "I Love the 90's" or "Best Week Ever", minor celebrities had to work for their money. While Jason Mraz or Rachel Harris (ps- I love you Rachel!) sit in a comfortable studio drinking stale Tab against a green screen, stars of the past had to find work anywhere they could find it. And sometimes they found that work on the ice.


Bateman and Milano before reinventing themselves with FOX and the WB respectively

The linked video file provides the best example of minor celebrity downtime. I also would like to add that it is so hilarious that you want to share it with everyone, but at the same time feel ashamed in a way you can't quite put your finger on. Be sure to pay special attention to the dialogue provided for the ice characters, specifically Mario...


Personally I prefer him from the episode where Wesley is touched by a camp counselor

Sublime Encounters on the Streets of Portland

It was with delight that I read this morning that Nigel Jaquiss, of Portland's Willamette Week, had won the Pulitzer Prize in Investigative Reporting for his 2004 unearthing of former Governor Neil Goldschmidt's three-year sexual relationship with a teenage babysitter. But it was an even greater delight to observe the two men sharing a moment today on one of Portland's sidewalks.


Posted by ryan on April 05, 2005 | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Is It Just Me?

The Serpent and the Rainbow

Or does Ash Wednesday always remind you of Bill Pullman?

My Dawg Skip

Many of you have friends. We all like them for one reason or another, whether it's their talent in the bedroom or their lavish spending habits, something about these people make you want to keep them around. I have a friend who has many talents, one of which is to be the most gifted correspondent of our technogically advanced times. Women describe him as intelligent, gentle, sweet, precocious, and handsome; what they don't know is that he is also endowed with an acute wit that transforms simple messages into works of art.

This is the email I received when he found out I was moving away... I give you the majesty that is Skippy:


Posted by iv on July 13, 2004 | Comments (710) | TrackBack

My Letter of Resignation

Since graduating from William and Mary in 2001, I have managed to maintain the same job until now. Upon my public announcement that I had been accepted to graduate school, my Program Director asked for my letter of resignation. Not an unusual request, but unusual considering that my last day of work will be roughly three months from the submission of the following letter. Behold, the actual submitted letter of resignation for my departure from a particularly well known think tank.


Posted by iv on May 21, 2004 | Comments (144) | TrackBack

Silence Interrupted

Bitches hanging out the window
exhorting inebriated creeps,
"keep your voices down;
people are trying to sleep"

but which more rudely intrudes,
i wonder,
into night's quiet peace
and invitation to slumber
than bitches yelling out the window,
"keep your voices down;
people are trying to sleep"?

Posted by ryan on May 03, 2004 | Comments (735) | TrackBack

4,000 Miles of Lessons Learned

Ah, the great American cross-country drive. A voyage of discovery; a venture into the heartland, across the badlands, and out the rear end. A trip you take slowly, not because you don't have places to be, but because they are all so damned far away. An archaelogical dig beneath the crust of this country, to unearth what makes it "great" and what makes it "American," to meet the common folk and rediscover your common values. If you're an elitist snob.

But if you're going to willingly place yourself into a small sedan for a week and a half, spending all day in a cramped front seat -- with your sister -- you'd best do it right. Lessons learned from each stop on the trip:


Marietta Memoirs

A thoughtful collection of retrospectives on life just west of Smyrna, Georgia, taken from its' original crayon-on-napkin form and reproduced for the benefit of reading online at the municipal computer terminal of Marietta Courthouse. Cyrus Worley is a contributing editor for Varmit Roundup and The Other Farmers Almanac. His work has also appeared in many 'example problem' sections of Georgia State Standardized Tests.



Elizabeth and I enjoyed leaving work in order to drink frozen coffee. Once a week or so, we saved the vital 4 dollars for ten ounces of office hooch that we might forget that in a given day we combined to complete 3 hours of real work.


My Friend Eric

Some of you may know him. Others may not. But my friend Eric is the greatest guy in the world.


Posted by ryan c on August 18, 2003 | Comments (133)


I have recently taken to counting the number DVDs I have collected over the past several months. When younger, I used to do this with CDs, mostly because I was lonely, excessively lonely, but also because of a more innate and complex love for order that I would discover later in life.